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Too many people think there is a magic technique to get them what they want in sales or other negotiations. They have it wrong, communication consultant Danielle Bolla tells finews.com.

Danielle Bolla, what is the most common misconception people have about how to communicate?

People are concerned that they don’t have enough to say. They worry about what they’re going to say. That isn't the problem: it's that they have too much to say and want to do so all at once. People on the receiving end are absolutely overwhelmed with detail. 

What does that lead to?

How much time can someone really focus? We’ve seen the attention span dwindle. So now you have to say what you’re going to say a lot quicker. The question is, how can I get what I need to say out there in a way that’s meaningful to another human being and is actionable? If you give me 15 minutes of content for something that is rather simple, I’ll space out, thinking about other things. Then you’ve lost the meaning of the conversation and the audience won’t take action.

Is there a maximum length to a presentation?

No. Because some people are really good at holding people’s attention. The cornerstone of what we teach is body, mind, and spirit. Thirty-five years ago, when we first introduced the concept in business, that was revolutionary. The mind is about having an organized, concise, tailored message that drives action. The body is the unique way we deliver our messages and the spirit component is about your purpose; what are you there to accomplish together.

«You can always tell if someone is interested or not»

How can you be of service? Today it’s understood these are the components to a human being. If I can hold your attention, have interest and curiosity about you and your business, and if you find me interesting and believe I care about you, then I’ll have more time with you. But I have to be present. If it feels like we’re just going through the motions, then I won’t be able to hold your attention and we won’t accomplish much.

What is the key to getting someone’s attention?

Be interested in them. And you can always tell if someone is interested in you or not.

How? And how do I make someone feel that I’m truly interested in them?

Little things, like eye contact. Smile. First, we’d have a little social chat and then we segue into business.